Bonding After Menopause

Let me introduce you to my family!

The other day I phoned my middle sister
not the youngest
that’s another story,
and we got to talking as sisters do
and she happened to mention
that she was now 50
AND I replied
YOU’RE FIFTY,
when did this happen?
and she said,
You’re not the ONLY one
getting older, CONNIE!
and I
chuckled
because
she is still the
spunky
outspoken one
and I
so sensitive
so shy
so
so princess!

Please, peas madam
could you
check my mattress
I feel a lump?

My mind is
over tired
and mired
in quick sand
and I’m
not feeling
like myself at all.

She was suitably unimpressed.

So to get a second opinion
I called
my mother and said
you know part of this
is my fault
and she in her diplomatic
fashion
replied,
YES, I KNOW!
Now get up
off your ass
and get a life!

Alrighty, then
I’ll check the danged mattress myself!

And sure enough
there was a golf ball
sized pea
and so
I went to the nearest
golf course and drove that sucker
into someone else’s bed.

And I plan to go to a different golf course next week.

Good Night and Good Driving!