Last night I dreamt
I was a dancer who sang
Madonna on steroids.
And I was magnificent
not merely okay
but outstanding.
I received cheers
and roses were strewn
at my feet
amid a standing ovation
while I blew kisses
and smiled waving at the throng
soaking up the adoration
like a sponge in the Mojave desert.
And not only that
way in the back
of this huge venue
of epic proportions
there were chickens
standing on a bridge
clucking
and chucking
outdated
clichés, verses
and dull
jokes
into the muddy
river below
And there were three of them
Chickens that is
and each proceeded to make a wish
making a total of
three wishes.
The first chicken
went to the side of the bridge
looked skyward
and took a shiny object
and flung it
into the water
with her beak
and her wish was to
find a talented male comedian.
The second wish
made by a PHAT hen
with a sharp comb
was
to make them ALL
including the aforementioned
comedian
gorgeous
with washboard abs
long well-defined legs
and tight little buns
AND the last wish
made by a younger chick
new to the barnyard
a first cousin
related by blood to
the founding father and
previous owner
who had recently passed
due to a flying chicken mishap
was to have this humorous
stunning masculine
stud
stay youthful
healthy
and to never grow old.
And it was further consecrated
by an elder from
The Famous Chicken Ranch in Vegas
thereby sealing the deal.
So they went home
and very soon thereafter
there stood before them
the studliest steeliest male
ever to strut through
the huge stately desert coop
they each called HOME
and he was infused
with a scent
that permeated the place
a scent that didn’t smell like farts
runny or deadly
a scent that lingered
like a slow and
rather dense
cloud of
carefully cultivated
medicinal satisfaction.
A cure
with benefits
for
these
now amazingly hungry
dreamers
who shall invoke
their fifth amendment rights
and remain
in the back corner
and masked whilst
giggling
and inhaling
more than their fair share of Oreo’s.
Because
they have never
EVER heard of a case
where ANYBODY ever
got loud, violent
or resorted to crime
due to this
non contagious sort of fantasizing.
Sincerely
The BIG CLUCKER
The Cute CHUCKER
and The LONE Sucker.
THE END!
Corney Press 