Back When Dirt Was A Vitamin


Back before the coronavirus pandemic
We called dirt a vitamin
Germs and viruses were a rite of passage
The patients grew up. They aged past thirty-five
Became old far too quickly, and their houses reeked of mothballs
They were the buxom aunts that slobbered kisses
The uncles that spit into their palms before they shook yours, thereby sealing the virtual deal.

Suddenly, the world goes haywire.

And BAM we are in a PANDEMIC
overnight we are directed to isolate and sanitize
Take stock of the financial fallout.

Stay at home
Work at home
Shop at home

Clean your home
Clean your phone
Color your own damned hair.

Sit and meditate.
Exercise

If you must go out to the grocery store
Make a list
Upon entering store
Follow the arrows on the floor
And keep a six-foot distance.

Swimming Pools closed
Libraries closed
Department stores closed

Churches closed
Restaurants closed
Cook at home

Don’t Travel
Don’t Cruise
Don’t Fly

Stay SAFE
Self Quarantine
Stay The Fuck HOME

FOR Thirty Days
at last count.

Good Luck.

Stimulus packages only serve to
bandaid the gaping wound
devaluing the dollar
and our ability to steer clear
of the virtual bottom.

Perpetuating the illusion
that this will be over soon
that we can reopen our lives
like a can of tuna
mix in some mayo
make a sandwich
chew and swallow any semblance of normal.

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