Hawaiian Trolling–Joke of the Day

A Mermaid by John William Waterhouse.
A Mermaid by John William Waterhouse. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hawaiian Trolling

Old Kimo, the Hawaiian fisherman

is kind of like the old man in Hemmingway’s, Old Man and the Sea

and being an islander he is deeply religious.

He gets up every day at 3:30 am.

It is dark and quiet and he’s all alone.

Sometimes he has male company but today he is alone.

Every day he takes his poles and his lucky lures loads them

onto his truck, drives off to his 26’ boat, which is docked in the harbor

where he then loads his boat and goes out into the pacific ocean to catch fish.

He’s done this every day for fifty years.

And he prays to GOD that he will catch enough

to feed his family and that he will come back safely and one other thing.

So today it’s Monday and he goes out like normal

and he’s talking to GOD and he says Today, I’ll see her; Today is going to be the day! Today is MY DAY!

And sure enough GOD hears him and today his prayers are answered.

And this beautiful, voluptuous mermaid swims up to the boat with a giant marlin in tow

and she says to the old man I have a proposition for you Kimo.

GOD has spoken to my heart, so it is your CHOICE

You can have ME or the fish—DECIDE NOW.

And Kimo thinks really, really hard and finally his eyes light up and he says ok

beautiful mermaid, I have decided.

Every day for fifty years I have been a good provider, a faithful husband and a good man

but I am an also OLD man,

so TODAY I choose you

and so she drops the rope and hops up on the boat

and Kimo looks deeply into her eyes,

throws out his best line and he says

Beautiful mermaid, come onna I wanna fillet ya!

And the marlin, who cannot believe his luck, swims away.

Moral: Fishing and living a good life brings its own rewards.

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